


Costume Play

by Thesis



Category: Free!
Genre: 2 boys with commitment issues trying to be a couple, Cosplay, Crossdressing, Implied ReiGisa, M/M, blah blah blah, generic storytelling, lingering traces of harurin, nitori pretending to be cooler than he is, school festival!!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-10
Updated: 2014-04-10
Packaged: 2018-01-18 20:53:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 15,253
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1442479
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thesis/pseuds/Thesis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rin doesn't have a cosplay fetish. Not at first.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Costume Play

Rin doesn't have a cosplay fetish. Not at first.

But it becomes Pavlovian. Is that a thing? When he asks Nagisa, figuring the weird kid will be the first to know about sex psychology, the blond tilts his head to the side to consider. On some level Rin even trusts him not to say anything to anyone else. More or less.

For once Nagisa doesn't give him any prying questions or looks, doesn't ask about his personal business. Instead he just blinks and asks curiously, "Pavlovian fetishes?" After a moment of consideration he brightens, "Oh! Like being called a good girl."

And then, for the first time to Rin's memory, Nagisa's face goes beet-red as he belatedly slaps a hand over his mouth.

Rin decides not to question further.

The point is, Rin has never really been into dress-up in a sexual way. He likes guys and likes muscle, and sure he tends to be attracted to fairly androgynous types, but cross-dressing just doesn't hold appeal. Costumes are so flashy. They're more silly than sexy, to him, because as someone with what he considers a _pretty_ damn good fashion aesthetic, he thinks they're usually designed terribly.

And it isn't like he hadn't seen Nitori in the maid outfit before. He just wasn't expecting it.

Rin freezes in the doorway, hand still on the doorknob and mind racing incoherently. He can see the curve of Nitori's shoulderblades as they fall into the low neckline at the back of the dress. The bow that ties at his waist is a bit off-center and he really just wants to straighten it. Or just tug it, untie it, and watch the whole outfit fall the floor in all its generic design and blandness.

None of the skin he can see is new to him. This really shouldn't get to him - not when he sees the kid in a swimsuit every day and has discreetly watched him change more than a dozen times. And really, all the thoughts immediately flooding his mind are about _removing_ that stupid dress.

Nitori sounds amused, greeting him over his shoulder without a hint of hesitation or shame, "Welcome back, Master."

Rin exhales. Composes himself. Steps into their shared dorm and tries not to let on to his bewilderement as he shuts the door and locks it with a firm _click_. He tries to greet him casually, in a very not-aroused way. What leaves his mouth is, "The fuck are you wearing that for?"

Well, he tried.

Nitori actually looks at him now, for a moment sincerely thoughtful, as if he can't quite recall. "Well, you know," is all he comes up with, and waves his hand vaguely.

"At least," Rin starts to say, but gets distracted when Nitori raises his knee, foot stepping onto his desk chair while he adusts his thigh highs. The dress isn't really what's doing it, but _damn_ if the thigh-highs aren't. He chokes and has to start again, "At least _clean_."

Once he's finished evening out his stupid sexy socks, Nitori just pouts. "I don't need to."

A beat. The two of them mutely look to Nitori's desk. There are seven different magazines open and spread over his unfinished homework. Two pencils and four highlighters, one missing its cap. An empty fast food bag and wrappers litter one corner, balled up but not thrown out yet. A drawer is open with his diary sticking out at an angle. A calculator he borrowed from Rin last night is on a magazine, but on top of a row of books, lined up in no particular order, is Nitori's _own_ calculator.

The moment of silence stretches as they both consider whether or not Rin will call him out on this lie.

Rin decides that at least the mess is contained, and he's no no mood to be arguing with Nitori. Or interacting with him at all. Or looking at him. Or breathing near him.

He needs to leave, but isn't sure how to do a 180 and leave the room inconspicuously.

Nitori breaks their quiet mourning for the surface of his desk by making his way over to Rin's bed and taking a seat. Rin tries to look casual, tossing his bag onto his own pristine and tidy desk while observing Nitori from the corner of his eye. The way he raises one leg to cross it over the other like a girl, his legs too thick and muscles too prominant to really pass. Even with a face that Rin could call feminine Nitori's body is anything but, and the dress does nothing to disguise the shape. His skirt is caught in his movement, flashing Rin an eyefull of smooth but strong thighs.

Rin approaches Nitori; it's his bed after all. Standing in front of him and glaring down to the smaller boy, he snaps, "Take that off, it's creepy!"

Nitori bats his eyelashes at Rin, an exagerated motion as a joke, then with half-lidded eyes begins to seductively slide the dress off his shoulder.

Rin tries to just grunt his disproval, but instead what comes out is a squawk that startles even Nitori.

Nitori, who had been doing it as a joke, but who's shoulders jump so suddenly that his dress really _does_ slip halfway down his arm. He flinches backwards so quickly that his socks catch on the blanket with his movement and one of them, the top stretched out by his muscular legs, slips loosely to bunch at his ankle.

Nitori blinks up at him, looking startled and amused all at once, half at his own over-reaction. Rin wants to think he looks _disheveled_ , on his bed, only he doesn't want to be thinking it _now_ , he wants to be thinking it when he is very alone.

His brain is a stupid blank, the way it gets when he's angry. Sometimes he sees nothing but red and he can't think straight, but this is different. This is like static when he tries to finish a thought and he can feel the electricity running under his skin. He feels like something else is controlling his tensed body.

He always feels in control around Nitori, knowing that for however weird the kid is, he is nothing if not obedient. He will always let Rin take the lead.

Today Rin is overly aware of how lost he must look to the boy when his cheeks are on fire but he feels the blood rushing elsewhere.

He reaches out to - he doesn't know - fix his dress? They're used to touching; Nitori always helps him stretch, sometimes has to shake him awake in the mornings. They have even play-wrestled once or twice, when Rin was in a particularly good mood and Nitori was _particularly_ brave. He does not think today is one of Nitori's brave does. Today is Nitori's _fucking weird_ day.

Then again, something tells him his reaction to it is way weirder.

His fingers don't even touch the sagging collar; he moved so fast that Nitori startles all over again, his whole body twitching away defensively, and in a knee-jerk reaction, the younger boy throws himself backwards, scooting all the way back against the wall.

Nitori can be jumpy, but Rin's called him out on it before and been assured plenty of times not to worry about it. And so, he ignores it. He just chases, crouching down and climbing onto his bed after the boy. With nowhere to hide, Nitori just looks at him, more bewildered than scared, as Rin pauses.

What was he doing? Fixing the dress.

Even Nitori mussing up the outfit and Rin gawking stupidly had been something easy to dismiss after the moment, but now they are in the shadow of the top bunk. Nitori's hair is raised in the back where he's slid against the wall and the whole room feels ten times darker and smaller.

They are not as close as it feels, but it is awkwardly warm with the heat of Nitori's body.

"I'll take it off," Nitori breathes, and Rin wonders if he knows how lewd his voice sounds like that. He's probably just trying to assure Rin that he'll change into normal clothes, telling Rin to get out of his way so he can change. Then the smaller boy laughs, and opens his mouth; starts to drawl, "Master."

Rin cuts him off, rolling his eyes and desperately grasping for normalcy between them, " _Oh_ my God."

"You're my God, right now," Nitori informs him brightly, "You're my Master."

"Then as your Master, I'm going to order you to wear something _normal._ "

Now that Nitori is against the wall with nowhere to run away to, Rin really does reach for the dress, this time making a fast grab for a ribbon-tail of the bow that he can see resting to the side. Nitori's arm flies to defend, slapping Rin's hand away like lightning. Rin still manages to yank the bow untied as he recoils, which really does nothing to the dress except make the apron slip, loose on one side.

His hand stings lightly. Rin stares at the red mark on the back of his hand, then to Nitori, who stares at him looking horrified. Blue eyes dart from his own hands, still raised in defense, back to Rin's narrowing eyes.

"Ohh no," Nitori begins, scooting helplessly in place, already backed in a corner. He tries, "I mean, I'm sorry - I--"

Rin unleashes tickle-hell. As he surges forward, leering over the boy, Nitori reflexively slouches down as far as humanly possible, trying to defend himself by shrinking away. It's easy for Rin to climb over the smaller boy, straddling him and alternating between swatting away his arms and running his fingers up the boy's sides through the dress, wiggling his fingers feather-light.

Nitori has tears in his eyes as he gasps for air, somewhere between sobbing and laughing. He kicks his legs violently, and at first just tries to grab Rin's wrists and pull his hands away from his sides, but Rin is the stronger of the two and wins that fight with ease. "Stop, stop!" Nitori cries between fits of giggling, and bumps his fists against Rin's chest helplessly.

"See, that's back-talking your master," Rin says haughtily, punctuated by his own breathes, heavy from the rough-housing, but heavier than he'd expected. The struggle continues for moments longer, their grunts and Nitori's whines filling up the whole room.

He notices when Nitori's struggling weakens. Suddenly Rin is acutely aware that the boy is flushed underneath him, body trembling. He decides to give him a break, and pauses in his tickling to hold him down by the wrists, pinning him in place.

"Senpai," Nitori whines breathlessly. Rin feels the way their bodies line up, feels his own weight weakly jostled with the movement of the younger boy's squirming. Feels the familiar but ill-timed twitch in his cock and is suddenly acutely grateful that he's wearing jeans that do a lot better to hide it than sweatpants would have.

"Master," Rin corrects, despite himself. Despite having many reasons that he really should hastily escape the situation. He stays. He looks down at red-cheeked Nitori, still breathing heavily and body still shaking. The younger boy's hair and dress are both ruffled to hell, and there are tear streaks at the corners of his eyes.

Nitori lets out a strange sound, quiet and helpless, then repeats, "Master."

Rin feels the erection pressing against his ass. Dresses, unsurprisingly, are not really made for concealing hard-ons.

He only reacts a fraction, a tiny startled twitch of his legs. But it's enough that Nitori notices; that Nitori quickly turns his head to the side with cheeks heated all over again and squirms with embarrassment and discomfort.

Rin feels his brain short circuiting, completely lost on how to handle this entire scenario. The fuzziness in his brain is back with vigor, filling his head with illicit reminders of what lies beneath him and what he'd like to do with it.

Realistically, he has always known that Nitori is interested.

Rin rolls his hips experimentally, watching the smaller boy's face change.

Nitori keeps his head turned, but his eyes dart in Rin's direction, confused, before clenching shut. "Rin," he starts to say, his voice delicate and nervous, even as he corrects himself back to this ridiculous game, "I mean - Master, um... I'm..."

He trails off, but when he opens his mouth to continue what Rin assumes is an apology, Rin interrupts him and mutters, "It's fine."

Rin takes great interest in the particular angle of Nitori's jaw as the smaller boy tilts his head to look up at him, unsure. Rin feels the boy's wrists move under his hands, not trying to escape, just flexing under his firm grip. He's startled to realize he was still holding him down and lets go, sitting back up as he straddles Nitori. The slide along the smaller boy's lap is deliberate.

Nitori lets out a deep breath as if he'd been holding it.

Rin asks, his voice hushed but still feeling over-loud in the quiet of their dorm room, "Do you want me to...?"

That's weird. He knows that's weird. If he can't even bring himself to say the words, that's a good sign that he shouldn't even be offering. But Nitori doesn't look disturbed. He just nods shyly as he covers his mouth with the back of one hand.

No going back now.

Rin slides himself down until he's between Nitori's legs.

Nitori's cock tents the front of the dress and apron, though it was already messy from all their rough-housing. Rin just thinks it's convenient. He's able to push it up and out of the way with ease. He slips his fingers into the waistband of Nitori's black briefs, then glances up to him to make sure it's still alright. Moments like this are pretty easy to read, but it's worth making sure. Nitori nods his permission, then averts his eyes immediately.

Once his underwear is down around his ankle, Rin is able to give his full attention where he wants to. Able to press light kisses to the inside of Nitori's thighs. He mouths against them hungrily, liking the feeling of hot skin against his mouth, and more importantly, the way Nitori gasps again, not unlike the way he had in the tickle-fight.

His hand circles Nitori's cock, and makes slow up and down pulls, too gentle, too loose to accomplish much of anything. He gives Nitori an almost idle handjob while he kisses at his thighs instead, feeling the way the boy's body shakes, the way he is barely surpressing himself from thrusting into Rin's leisurely strokes.

He tastes like chlorine. Familiar and nostalgic. He knows, objectively, that it's not a great smell, but he's always had rose-tinted memories of it, strong enough to make him like it.

The room had been oddly silent after their horsing around, and now the sounds that bounce against the walls are wet. Nitori's breathing is shaky, and he whimpers at each press of lips, at each suckle and barely-there bite of teeth into his flesh. The silver haired boy tries, and to Rin's satisfaction, fails to contain a weak moan. "Please?"

Rin pretends he's going to. He pulls away from the smaller boy's thighs and instead runs his tongue up the shaft of his cock. He licks his way up like a treat, pleased with Nitori's full-body shudder.

Then he pulls away and looks at Nitori, wanting to see him all mussed and needy. There is probably nothing better than the sight of him, sprawled under Rin on his bed. Rin is still not a fan of the dress. He'd look better without it.

The boy makes a pitiful mewl at the loss, and eyes Rin with pleading eyes.

Rin asks, "Aren't you supposed to be servicing _me?_ " Because it's easier to play along with a bit than it is to be awkward and nervous and _himself_.

Nitori looks at him wide-eyed, with hands stupidly balled in his skirt, tugging it in the general direction of down, but without doing anything to cover himself. "I can," he says, quickly throwing himself into any answer Rin wants if it'll get that mouth back on him, "I - do you want--"

He cuts himself off with a squeek as Rin takes the head of his cock into his mouth. He needed to interupt him; he suspects the boy isn't play-acting like Rin is, and that's too much for him, right now. Nitori arches his back, head craning backwards in a silent gasp.

Rin sucks gently, motions slow and languid. He rests his tongue on the underside of Nitori's dick, dragging up his length inside his mouth. He feels the boy quivering faintly, and doesn't mind the way he pushes into Rin. It is a careful, gentle press, desperate for more but not wanting to gag him.

Rin rewards him by sucking harder. He takes as much of Nitori's cock into his mouth as he can, then pulls back until it is just the head and swirls his tongue loosely. He nods back down again, and for what he can't fit down his throat, he keeps stroking with his hand.

Rin closes his eyes to bury himself in the sounds and gasps the other boy lets out.

He feels one of Nitori's hands, warm over his, not guiding or stopping him; just resting and following his motions at his pace. He doesn't stop what he's doing, but glances upwards. His own unattended erection throbs so painfully that he almost regrets it; Nitori is covering his face with his free arm, but Rin can still see his red ears and wet lips looking ripe for kissing. He sees the heave of his chest and the way his fingers twitch, groping aimlessly at the air over him.

He hums, low in his throat, feeling the way the body beneath him shivers.

Nitori's voice is quiet and low, an uncontrollable whisper not meant to be heard by anyone, "Rin-senpai, mn..."

Rin pulls back to remind him _Master_ , and feels his teeth drag lightly. He loses track of what he was going to say in the way Nitori chokes, briefly going rigid, knees shaking. Instead he asks, voice thick, "'S it good?"

He sees Nitori nod, and shifts himself upwards, feeling his body drag up Nitori's length. The silver haired boy peers at Rin cautiously.

"Senpai?" He asks.

Rin corrects him this time, "Master."

Nitori nods mutely.

The redhead keeps his hand moving in gentle strokes, his grip tighter now that he isn't using his mouth anymore. He jerks Nitori off between their bodies, enjoying the way he thrusts back into it, setting a nice rhythm. Rin can only support his own weight shakily.

He presses their foreheads together, watching the boy with interest. He isn't sure who's sweat it is where they touch and doesn't care. Nitori's eyes close and Rin revels in his panted hot breaths against his mouth.

"You said - me next, right?" He murmurs, voice low.

Nitori's eyelashes flutter, and now that he isn't hiding his face, his hand reaches up and buries into Rin's hair, fingers tangling themselves up and rubbing gently. "Yeah," he mutters, sounding dizzy and lost in the handjob, "Yeah."

There's a rhythm to the hand in his hair; Nitori buries his fingers in, runs it through to make sure there are no snags, before massaging his scalp. It's soothing and relaxing and Rin thinks if his dick weren't so hard it might make him sleepy. Rin kisses him, without much thought, and the younger boy, with eyes closed, startles for a moment before kissing back.

When he pulls back Rin asks lowly, "Gonna service me good?"

Nitori moans into his mouth, his hips bucking into Rin's palm desperately. "I will," He promises, "Whatever you want."

Rin shifts to nibble at his earlobe, liking the low groan it ellicits. "Anything?"

"Mm," Nitori agrees, tilting his head to give easier access. His cock presses into the grip of Rin's hands, wet and slick with precome and spit. He breathes, "I'll make you come, Rin-senpai - Ahh... Could use my mouth or..." He cuts himself off with a moan, and nuzzles his face back towards Rin, silently asking for more kisses.

Rin oblidges and very desperately forces himself not to think about this or its repercussions too deeply. Or how easily Nitori volunteers himself.

He kisses him again, feels his teeth knick him where he didn't mean to but gets no reaction from it, like it's normal. He needs to distract himself, and asks, "Good - you were saying? Or what?"

Nitori's thrusts get erratic, his voice shaking and interrupted; "Or - _mm_ , R... Ah -I mean M-Master, you could um... F-fuck, Rin-Senpai, I'm so close, I can't--"

"You can," Rin assures him. "You can come, Ai."

Nitori goes quiet save for his labored breathes, fucking Rin's hand on the verge of coming.

Rin's grip goes tighter, his pumps faster. His hand slides up and down Nitori's cock smoothly, and he is so, _so_ painfully hard, himself. He can feel Nitori losing himself and it's so damn beautiful to feel him come undone. To watch him shudder like a wave that runs through his whole body, and Rin wants to push it as far as he can while the boy is on the edge like this. He prompts him with his lips to his throat: "Hm?"

"You could... Ah - you could fuck me, I could suck you off, I'll pay you back, p-promise."

"I'll hold you to that," Rin tells him, and Nitori moans incoherently, pulling him up into a kiss by the hair. Rin only allows it briefly, before he draws his whole body back, returning his mouth over Nitori's cock.

Nitori chokes, toes curling. "Good - feels good, Senpai--er. Master. Whichever. I wanna suck you off an', ah _ahh_ , I wanna ride you so bad."

Rin shows his appreciation for the image with his tongue, and with a light, purposeful graze of his teeth.

Nitori's fingers bury in his hair and tug him back gently, a warning which Rin ignores as the boy mumbles almost nonsensically. "I love -- your hair, Senpai, 'm so close, y-you can, _nng_ ," and then his grip goes rough and his words slurr, fast and blurred into each other, and Rin feels his length twitch before come hits the inside of his mouth.

He rests with his mouth still over him until the boy is spent, then rises. He swallows, and has to resist the urge to wipe his mouth.

Rin stares down at the boy, who's body trembles as he tries to regain his breath. It is criminal to look that sexy, he's sure of it. It's criminal to get teased and tended to so long and leave Rin like this.

Nitori doesn't intend to. He starts to say, breathlessly "I can--"

"--'S fine," Rin tells him, his words coming out quickly and before his brain has caught up with - God, with _anything_. What the _fuck_ has even been happening today? And how is it even remotely fine? And _why_ would he turn him down?

Nitori sounds confused in the quiet sounds he lets out as he catches his breath, but Rin can't answer any unspoken questions. Out of fear that they'll actually be asked outloud, he quickly excuses himself. He goes to the restroom to get a drink of water and to fix his tangled hair. Then goes straght from the bathroom to the door, not looking back to Nitori once.

And then he runs - he runs _very_ far away.

***

He finally comes home to their dorm at just before midnight, feeling tense and uncomfortable with what he's sure will have to happen.

Nitori greets him, "Welcome back," almost like everything is normal. But the words make Rin's shoulders straighten uncomfortably, and he doesn't miss the odd waver to the boy's voice. After a moment, as he is clarifying something, Nitori adds, "Senpai."

His underclassman is sitting at his desk, and his gaze is straight on his homework. Rin is quiet so long that blue eyes dart up to him, only lingering until Rin nods. He waits for the inevitable conversation that he really, _really_ doesn't want to have. He's already running his brain at maximum speeds to think of excuses and escapes.

But Nitori takes his greeting and returns to his work.

Rin supposes he's going to finish up, first. He tries not to think about it and does his own thing until precisely one in the morning, when Nitori yawns, stretches, and asks, "Can I turn the lights off?"

Rin nods at him distractedly.

And Nitori sleeps.

And Rin does not.

He watches the dusty morning light gently sweep its way into the room as the sun rises. His eyelids are finally feeling heavy, sleep fluttering away his sight, when Nitori murmurs something incoherent in his sleep. There is the familiar morning rustling of blankets and clothes, and then a silence too deep for sleep.

Nitori speaks in a whisper, "Are you awake?"

Rin grunts affirmative.

There is a sigh of relief, a beat, then a curious sound. "Why?"

"You," Rin answers before thinking about it. He realizes belatedly what he's said, but dismisses any worry over it. He's too tired to even care. In fact, he thinks he may have dozed off between this, and Nitori's following apology. His "'S fine," is drowsy, and the younger boy seems to sense that he hasn't slept yet.

"Um... So about..."

Rin is tired. He is tired and he thinks he can finally sleep, because he knows that Nitori is nothing if not obedient, and he tells him, "Not now." His voice is gruffer than he meant it. He knows he wouldn't be able to keep sleepy irritation out of his words and thoughts if they talk about this now.

Nitori sounds dejected; "Okay." After a pause, "Then, um. Good morning. Good night."

***

Nitori does not push it. The boy waits for him to bring it up first - which is convenient, because it means Rin can settle back into a state of not-dealing-with-that.

For the most part, normalcy returns. They go running together. They practice. Sometimes Rin helps him with his English homework in exchange for help with his history assignments, and sometimes they take short walks to the convenience store just to get out of the dorm for a bit.

Nitori does not wait up for him every little time he's out late, and does not stick to his side like he has no other friends. He had never done those things before, and nothing appears to have changed.

They are still friends. Just friends who happened to have sex the other day. As far as Rin can tell, this is what Nitori sees.

But every so often, Nitori will look at him like there is something more he wants to say, and his body language goes small. He shifts his weight, and stares Rin down.

At first Rin feels uncomfortable under his gaze, self conscious of his own avoidance. But Nitori blushes shyly and sometimes opens his mouth like he wants to suggest something. At first it is awkward.

After a couple of weeks he is just exhasperated, and will roll his eyes until Nitori stops or just _asks_ already so Rin can shoot him down.

It finally happens at the end of practice. In the middle of the changing rooms, after everyone has left, Nitori snaps, "Can we please talk about that, though?"

Rin is so startled that he forgets to be angry, and just looks at the younger boy, wide-eyed.

Rin knows what he will ask for. He will want to be boyfriends, want to kiss, and go on dates and cuddle, and want all kinds of things Rin isn't sure he can do. Except the sex part. He could definitely do that part again.

He recalls that he wanted the other things, when he was young. A weirdly romantic boy, he realizes, now that he is older and goes to an all boys school and hears the crude and hormonal idiocy that spills out of everyone's mouths each day.

He remembers reading Gou's shoujo manga, when he was younger, and watching Disney movies about true love. He used to curl up with his sister on their mother's lap and look through the old bridal magazines she had bought before her wedding. They were a bit dated, but he wonders if that had something to do with his romantic preferences.

He has to physically shake his head to clear the thoughts of _weddings_ of all things, from his mind. Nitori interprets this as getting shut down again, but this time huffs defiantly, eyebrows furrowed.

"Rin-senpai," He says. Then: "I dislike being indebted, you know."

Rin blinks. He feels his cheeks heating up against his will. "Er. It's. Don't worry about it?"

Nitori seems oddly unashamed, and insists, crossing his arms over his chest stubbornly, "I owe you, Senpai."

Rin growls. He doesn't care about any stupid bullshit Nitori said while he was in the middle of getting jerked off. Erections have a way of fucking with your head, and Rin is willing to lean against that excuse for as long as he can.

And Nitori, who everyone already jokes is in love with him. Hell, who even makes jokes himself sometimes about being in love with Rin. Nitori will lean on what happened to try to start something, Rin is sure of it.

"Just forget about it," Rin bites out. For emphasis, to make absolutely sure Nitori understands, he motions between the two of them. "Nothing is happening. We're not - a thing."

Nitori looks terribly confused. After a long moment, he speaks up, slowly. "What? No, I know. I just wanted things to be even."

Rin blinks. All he manages is, "Oh."

There is a long silence, during which Nitori apparently shrugs and moves on with life, and Rin stares intensely at his locker door.

Oh.

***

Despite Nitori's complaint, it still doesn't happen for some time.

But he realizes that what he thought were hints that Nitori wanted to talk were actually far from it. The message he was trying to send was quite a bit more illicit. And now, having realized that Rin doesn't take to subtlety very well, he gets bolder.

The jokes about being his number one fanboy come to an abrubt halt, replaced with sexual innuendo, and only sometimes when they are in private. Surrounded by teenage boys, innappropriate jokes are easily made without question; no one bats an eye when he turns innocent statements sexual with a suggestive hum. He does not so much as look in Rin's direction.

But Rin knows it's for him. He knows that Nitori leans too close on purpose and speaks lowly to him in private. He notices when his underclassman sits on the lower bunk more often, and when his pajamas change from sweatpants to loose shorts.

He pointedly ignores each and every hint, at first because he is still confused by the idea of Nitori actively pursuing sex without a relationship. Somehow it doesn't suit his image of the boy, but the more he thinks about it, the more he realizes he knows very little about him. He knows his idle habits; the face he makes when he's texting and the way his mess spreads across the whole room. The way he shrinks into himself when he's upset, not just when he flinches, but when he's angry or sad. The way he always seems to know where Rin was, but disappears for hours and talks nonstop when he gets back without ever explaining where he went.

But they do not discuss things like - what he thinks about relationships. His other friends. His other hobbies.

For as much time as they spend together, and even being roommates aside, they spend a _lot_ of time together - the focus has always been on Rin. Even after his months-long-emotional-breakdown, Nitori is always fussing over what Rin wants and needs.

And it eats at him.

Nitori is helping him with history again - leaning over his shoulder, breath hot on his neck. His slender fingers gingerly hold Rin's hand over his pen, as if he needed help with writing, and Nitori's voice is soft by his ear.

"So she ran away with her guard and advisor, to meet her mother," Nitori is saying softly when Rin decides he can't handle it anymore. Godm he even thinks this old legend is fascinating, and not just because Nitori is the one telling him about it. But he can't concentrate, and he wrenches his hand away from Nitori's, snaps his book shut, and stands so quickly that he nearly knocks over his chair. Nitori stumbles backwards, startled.

"Going running," He says.

Nitori's hum sounds oddly amused.

***

When Rin returns, Nitori is in the middle of making the bed on Rin's bunk. He is bent over, ass on display, straightening the blankets, and apparently the view Rin is greeted with wasn't on purpose. Nitori lets out an embarrassingly high shriek at the sound of the door, immediately straightening, bumping his head on the bunk as he does. Nitori tries to play it off, whirling around with his hands tugging the short skirt he's wearing down.

It's a nurse uniform, this time. Not too costume-y, Rin notices. Stylized, sure; real nurses just wear scrubs. But the dress is pastel pink with a pencil skirt wrapped tight around his hips, and a garter-belt holds up white thigh-highs.

 _Fucking_ thigh-highs again.

Rin slams the door shut behind him, far more concerned with someone seeing Nitori in a mini-skirt and high heels than he was a frilly dress and mary-janes.

When he's composed himself, Nitori bows with a bright smile and says, "Welcome back, Doctor!"

"Oh, fuck that," Rin groans, and runs a hand through his hair. "You're being ridiculous."

"Well!" Nitori huffs, immediately breaking any sort of character and crossing his arms again. He leans to one side, hips prominent. The part of his legs stretches the material and - Rin decides he likes pencil skirts more than frill. "You were being stubborn!"

"How does this help?!"

The younger boy's hands come to rest on his hips. "It helped last time! Or is it just maids?"

"I--No!"

"Sit," Nitori commands him, pointing at his bed.

Rin clicks his tongue, taking a moment to calm himself and lower his voice. If he shouts too much at this hour, Mikoshiba might come check on them. When he's composed himself, he falls into a seat on the bed and asks "Isn't the doctor supposed to be in charge?"

"Then you're the patient," Nitori says, impatiently tapping his foot. "Who cares? Or - do you actually like the roleplay stuff?"

Rin's hand buries itself in his hair, running through it to massage away an impending headache. "No, Ai. Jesus."

Nitori gets down on his knees between Rin's legs, but then sits there like it was simply the most convenient seat available in the room. He says, skeptically, "You seemed into it last time. Anyway, just checking."

It isn't even arousing with how casual Nitori is being. Because, sure, the dress looks okay on him and those _stockings_ , Christ. But Rin is just _confused_.

He has never really considered himself someone to fuck outside of a relationship. Then again, the idea of being in a relationship fucking terrifies him.

But here Nitori is, leaning forward to undo Rin's belt for him just as relaxed as Rin himself is tense. He thinks that kind of casualness is nice. That level of comfort is something in relationships that he's never really thought of before. He wonders how long it takes to get there.

"So did you decide?" Nitori asks him, hands working at his slacks, now. Rin makes no move to stop him, but quirks an eyebrow when the boy glances up. To clarify, the younger boy explains, "What you wanted. Just a blowjob, or--"

"--There is literally no mood, here," Rin interrupts, too embarrassed to hear the rest.

Nitori shrugs. "There doesn't need to be, does there? We're just fooling around, Senpai. Don't stress." And with that, he rises up higher, enough to push Rin's shirt up and press his lips against his abdomen. He mouths his way down, and Rin suppose that a mood can make itself, and that maybe he should just stop over-thinking things.

***

Rin is pretty sure that nothing in the entire world is better than Nitori riding his cock.

He is also pretty sure he is going to fail this boring class because - God, he can't concentrate at all. He tries. He tries to listen to the teacher's lecture and make notes, but they just end up being lists of whichever words the teacher said the loudest.

His mind keeps flickering back to the smooth back and forth of Nitori rocking onto him and the particular way he sometimes took Rin all the way inside, grinding down rhythmically.

Nitori has muscle on him, for sure. Rin has seen him - oh _yes_ he has seen him. Changing in the locker room, showering after practice. Climbing out of the pool in his speedo with water dripping down his body and his hair clinging to his cheeks.

But he is so light. It's surprisingly easy to lift the boy over his lap with his hands under his knees.

He isn't sure he will ever be over this, but with Nitori apparently not being heart-set on any romantic involvement, he might not _have_ to get over it. He shivers at the thought, feeling surprisingly pleased with his place in the world.

Rin thinks about this all day.

Yet, after school, after practice, when they are finally alone together - he isn't sure what to do.

The thing about sex is that it requires a bit of lead-in. Cuddling, kissing, making out, touching. _Something_ has to give way. With the nurse outfit it had started as a blowjob. Then it had been rubbing against him from behind, curled behind him. His precum had made the heat of Nitori's thighs smooth and wet and the younger boy hadn't even called him out on being a weirdo for rutting his length between his thighs. He had been moaning.

He had even been the one to give in, pulling away and snapping, voice high, "Will you just sleep with me already?" before mashing his mouth against Rin's abrubtly.

But Nitori is not his boyfriend. Not someone he can kiss out of the blue _before_ sex.

The mood had not made itself last time, Rin realizes. Rather, Nitori had forced a mood by being weird.

So they do not sleep together again, as much as Rin wants to. _Desperately_ wants to.

He realizes, belatedly, that it was Nitori owning up to an offer he considered a debt. Now that it's paid, it's very likely that he doesn't intend to sleep with Rin again.

That would make sense. They are not a couple.

Rin considers this very intensely, staring blankly at the same page of his homework for nearly an hour.

***

Weeks later, Nitori caves.

Rin comes back to their dorm room to find him in a cheerleader's uniform.

"Welcome back," Nitori chirps, then falters. "... I don't know what to call you for this outfit. Um. Captain?"

"God no," Rin breathes, failing to keep his voice as horrified as it should be. "Never call me that."

Nitori just laughs, as if he is relaxed and this is the most natural situation. Rin has to force his body language to look normal. He doesn't betray his excitement as he carefully sets down his bag by the door.

He approaches Nitori, standing close enough to feel the warmth of his body without touching him, and tries to sound exhasperated; "Where are you even getting these outfits?"

Nitori beams up at him. "Kagamin is in the theater club."

There are a lot of questions Rin wants to ask. Why are school-owned costumes to sexualized? Why are there so many girl's costumes at an all boy's school? Were the thigh-highs part of the costume or were those Nitori's?

Instead he asks, "If he knew why you were borrowing them, do you think he'd still lend them to you?"

Nitori considers this for a moment. "Probably. But he would complain more." A beat. "Don't tell him."

Rin gives him a withering look, wondering if Nitori realizes that Rin wouldn't have told, even if he _did_ have any idea who the fuck Kagamin is.

And in Nitori's weirdo fashion, the younger boy responds by wrapping his arms around Rin's shoulders. He has to stand on his toes to pull him into a heated kiss. Rin's side of their sudden makeout session is distracted. He returns the kissing, easily letting Nitori's tongue into his mouth, but his mind wanders.

Because if Rin is still just his upper-classman, just someone he fools around with for fun... Who's to say he isn't fooling around with other friends?

And who's to say Rin has any right to care?

His grip on Nitori's waist goes tight and he pulls the smaller boy flush against him.

When they are finished, sweaty and exhausted, Nitori pulls away from him too quickly for Rin's taste. He stretches on the edge of the bed, and Rin stares at his back where the cropped tank-top cuts off. Stares at his muscles tensing and leading down into the ridiculous pleated mini-skirt.

"A little rougher than usual," Nitori observes, his hand flitting over the bite marks on one shoulder. Rin wonders if twice was enought to call 'usual.'

"My bad," Rin says, tone flat and unapologetic.

Nitori turns to look at him, smiling. "I like to be handled roughly."

Rin rolls his eyes, but a part of him that was tense and guilty relaxes. Rin supposes you'd have to like being handled roughly to be with him. Rin is not oblivious to his own nature.

He frowns at his own thoughts. Nitori is not with him.

***

The costumes are their secret code. If Nitori is wearing some ridiculous get-up, it means Rin is getting laid. All in all a pretty good deal, even if Rin vehemently denies being even remotely aroused by the costumes. Or he would if he talked to anyone about all this.

He doesn't. Except Nagisa, briefly. He considers talking to Rei, but he can only imagine him A) fainting on the spot or B) trying to discuss which outfits are more beautiful and erotic, and Rin can't decide which of those is worse.

He decides perhaps future discussions will stray from the whole kinky sex thing and maybe address the other issue.

He wants to date Nitori.

He is also terrified of dating Nitori. He has been broken for so long, and Nitori was right there trying to help him pick up the pieces. He knows how low Rin can fall, and he's scared because he's fine now, really, but he is also still in high school and he is sure there will be times in his life when he stumbles again and throws a tantrum.

Nitori has already seen him weak, and it scares him more than with his old friends.

He stares at their names in his phone, scrolling up and down through his contacts and wondering who to ask and how to ask it. Wondering what he even wants to ask them.

Nitori practically kicks in the door - rare, for him. He is usually such a consiencious roommate, quiet and careful and often times knocking on his own door. This time it seems to have been because his arms are full, black fabric and frills drapped across them. "Rin-Senpai! Measurements!"

Rin does not so much as sit up from where he is lounging on his bed. "Hah?"

"Culture festival," Nitori says, the barest of explanations, and bustles into the room. "You need a new costume this year." Like a side-note over his shoulder, "Oh, mine still fits, by the way."

Another freshman follows him in easily, looking bored but carrying a small notebook and pencil. He is just a bit taller than Nitori, with light ruffled hair and blue eyes, and says quietly, "I think I want to modify it a bit, though."

Nitori climbs onto the bed, practically onto Rin's lap before the other boy has even shut the door behind him. Actually, from the way he stands in the doorway, watching, he doesn't appear to have any intentions of closing that door.

Rin tries not to be uncomfortable - or worse _comfortable_ with Nitori straddling one of his legs.

Before he can ask, Nitori is repeating, "Measurements!" and stretching out measuring tape.

"Ugh," is all Rin manages, then goes deadweight. Nitori rolls his eyes, and he makes exagerated whining sounds and complaints the whole time, but still goes about measuring, reading off numbers to the stranger in the doorway.

The other boy has the faintest trace of a smile on his face.

He looks back to Nitori, the smaller boy excitedly measuring around his arm just under the shoulder. Nitori murmurs to himself, "Oh, that's - I should tell Gou-san."

"What?"

"Nothing."

They leave as quickly as they left, but Nitori returns another couple hours later.

Rin does not ask who that was, but his whole body feels like it's vibrating with the question. Nitori doesn't seem to sense it, going about his business without any mind to Rin. When he does finally say, it's after giggling to himself over a text message he's received.

He turns and looks over his shoulder and tells Rin, casually, like it hasn't been gnawing at the older boy for hours, "That was my friend Kagamin, by the way."

Rin does his best to look disinterested.

Nitori paces the room while he texts. He walks back and forth aimlessly, waiting for replies, then takes slow, uneven steps while typing back replies. Rin memorizes the look on his face as each time he starts to text his steps falter, like he only realizes a couple words in that he can't text and walk at the same time. It's kind of cute.

When Nitori circles by Rin's bunk, the redhead immediately reaches for him, grabbing the hem of his shirt almost reflexively.

"Do you want to..." Rin begins, wanting Nitori's attention to be on him and not his cell phone. He trails off, unsure of what to even suggest for them to do together. All he can come up with is jogging, but before he gets it out, Nitori quirks a knowing eyebrow at him.

"Oh," Nitori says, sounding like he knows a secret. Then, a little more shyly - they have never really had to deal with this situation before he's dressed up - he asks, "Want me to get changed?"

Rin blinks up at him.

Well, his mind hadn't been there, but now that it's on the table. He nods, mutely.

This time it's a sailor-style schoolgirl uniform.

This time he remembers what Nitori said, that likes to be handled roughly, and - it's clearly true enough. The way the boy _squirms_ when he's bitten, the way he writhes and moans when Rin's grip goes rough.

He calls him Senpai the whole time, not some stupid half-hearted roleplay nickname. He whimpers Rin's name, face buried in the crook of his neck.

***

"Oh, by the way," Makoto says, innocently enough, "I heard the Samezuka culture festival is soon."

Rin, sprawling out on Haruka's living room floor - ignoring Rei and Nagisa's complaints that he takes up too much space - just sets a suspicious gaze on the brunet. He nods, slowly.

"We should be able to make it, this time," Makoto says, as if last time was a fluke and not Rin having a months-long emotional breakdown and forcefully keeping them away. Rin doesn't miss the way Haruka's eyes flicker to Makoto with interest.

"I heard from Nitori-kun," Makoto continues. "Your team does a cafe?"

Nagisa is already making excited noises in the background like he wants someone to call on him in class. Rin ignores the blond - and Makoto's question.

"I want to go," Haruka says, voice unreadable as ever. He does not look up from the magazine he is back to flipping through.

"The pool will be closed," Rei reminds him, just in case. Haruka shoots him a dirty look, though Rin isn't sure if it's to say _I know_ or upset at the information.

"He said," Makoto says, making his 'not at all manipulative' look of feigned thoughtfulness, "it's a maid cafe."

Nagisa gasps loudly, whirling to look at Rin. He's making his excited sounds all over again, and Rei looks unnerved, trying to settle him down.

"Don't say a word," Rin commands him.

Nagisa wilts like a scolded puppy. Unfortunately, this exchange was suspicious. He feels everyone's eyes on him, all shining with interest. Even Haruka looks visibly curious. He tries to distract them, or at the very least have them interested in the maid cafe over Nagisa's secrecy. "I'll be a butler, in my year."

Haruka asks with just a hint of amusement in his voice, "Then last year--"

Nagisa interrupts him, unable to hold back and asking "--What about Ai-chan? Will he be a maid?"

Rin frowns at him. "Yes."

Rei gives the blond this strange sort of warning look, and when he catches Rin looking at him suspiciously, looks _apologetic._ Like he knows something he shouldn't.

After a moment of consideration, piecing things together, Rin sits up to whirl on Nagisa. "You told!" He accuses.

Nagisa flinches away guiltily, but defensively cries, "Rei-chan already knew!"

Rin's face is in competition with his hair as it flushes with frustration and embarrassment all at once. "Like hell he did!"

"It's not like you're _subtle_ ," Nagisa insists, crossing his arms defensively. "Mako-chan knows, too."

Makoto has the decency to look guilty, but nods defeatedly. "You... Kind of talk about him a lot. And watch him all the time. And touch him a lot. And - you get really upset when he doesn't come out with us when we invite him. But not angry, like you usually are, but more sulky."

No one says anything about maid costumes. Rin goes silent, and after a long moment asks slowly, "Wait, what 'secret' does everyone here know?"

Haruka looks completely lost, looking at Makoto helplessly. Rin isn't sure if he wants to laugh at him or if he's grateful that _someone_ in the room isn't freakishly aware of his business. Whichever business that may be.

Rei ventures, "You're in love with Nitori-kun, aren't you?"

Rin breathes out like he'd been holding it for hours. Their secret was not what he thought. His is not what they think. He buries his fingers in his hair for a moment before running them through it. The laugh bubbles out of him before he can stop it, and he feels vaguely hysterical. "Oh my God."

He looks to Haruka; the the boy stares back, wide eyed. "Are you?"

Rin's fingers leave his hair. This is complicated. Haruka is the last person he wants to talk to about this, but he _also_ the only person he wants to tell. And he isn't even sure what he wants to tell him, exactly. "Don't ask me that."

Haruka nods, accepting this as an answer and instructions, and Rin thinks there is a part of him that still loves him. Until - Rin can see the mischief in his eyes, even with such muted expressions. Haruka asks, "what was the real secret?"

Rin doesn't answer, but feels his cheeks heating up.

Makoto and Rei both look confused that what they knew wasn't it. Nagisa bounces in place, pleased as punch and eager to spill.

Rin looks at the blond and says, pointedly, "Down, girl."

Nagisa sits still, obediently covering his suddenly-red face with his hands and looking mortified. "Don't," he pleads.

" _You_ don't, then," Rin demands. Nagisa nods, and Rin looks at Rei suspiciously. The boy's face is ten times redder.

Rin is exhausted with this. He is exhausted with his friends knowing things that he is still working on and he is exhausted with keeping secrets and skirting around things. He is exhausted of acting like he only wants to sleep with Nitori, and using stupid fucking costumes like a secret code instead of just talking.

He knows it is his own fault.

He has to forcefully resist the urge to lay all his cards on the table in a fit of irritation. A twisted part of him wants to announce that Nagisa and Rei are probably banging and that the weird kid gets off on being called a good girl, and that Nitori is his friend-with-benefits but only when he's in costume.

He just wants to see their faces.

Rin lays back down, but by now Nagisa has stretched out his legs where he had been. Rin just uses them as a head-rest.

"I think it's sweet," Rei says as if he is defending him. It kind of makes it even _more_ embarrassing. If it had been Makoto saying it, that would have been alright, but Rei does not say kind things to assure people at every possible opportunity like Makoto does. He makes observations.

Rin just waves a hand dismissively. "It's a hassle." After a long pause, "dating and stuff."

Nagisa looks down at him, and his expression is surprisingly understanding. Sincerely, the blond tells him, "I think you'd like it, though."

Rin peers at him through his hair that he can't be bothered to push out of his face. "Maybe."

***

Rin gets away with doing very little to prepare for the festival. The whole school is full of boys running around accomplishing little and slacking off at maximum levels. Rin spends most of the preperation days standing around and observing.

Nitori is one of the few who is always rushing back and forth. He gets downright bossy with the other swimclub members, making sure everyone is on task. His friend swings by a couple times to take measurements and make everyone try on costumes.

Rin takes vicious pleasure in watching the newbies this year screech about the maid dresses. It's also endearing that Nitori rolls his eyes at them when they aren't looking when he's all smiles to their face, assuring them that they'll feel less awkward in a group.

Some of the boys aren't as shy. They wear their dresses and laugh obnoxiously loud and run down the halls in them to show all their friends.

Everyone looks ridiculous.

Rin is watching a race between three of the newest boys, the group of them lifting their skirts and bowling each other down as they yell and laugh, when he hears Nitori step up beside him.

Nitori smooths out the maid skirt and looks up to meet Rin's gaze. Rin doesn't meet blue eyes - he looks down at his defined collar-bone and the lower neckline this time around. His dress was modified after all.

Rin really doesn't want to blush. "We should hang out," he says, looking away so that he doesn't.

Nitori hums curiously. "Did you want to go to the store with me? I told Kagamin I'd bring him more thread and pick up snacks."

Rin nods, and when he looks back, Nitori is beaming up at him.

"Wait here," the younger boy says. "I'll get changed."

Rin wonders why he'd put the outfit on in the first place, but waits patiently. Nitori returns looking much more like himself. His T-shirt has some cartoon animal on it and his pants look a little too big; he's holding them up at the hip.

It is not a sultry maid costume, but Rin still wants to kiss him senseless. Wearing sweatpants and whatever-shirt-was-clean, a fashion disaster in Rin's book, Nitori looks more like _himself_.

Rin catches Nitori kicking his feet as they walk to keep the pants from getting stepped on.

"Kagamin's," Nitori explains.

"You in his pants, too?" Rin asks. He means it as a joke, but Nitori flinches like he does when Rin snaps at him for real.

"Just you," Nitori mumbles, watching the ground very intently. "I mean, we used to, but--"

"Stop," Rin commands. He does a good job of forcing his voice neutral. Nitori does not wince, just looks at him, curiously. Rin meets his eyes. "Don't want to hear about it."

"Alright," Nitori agrees. They walk in silence for a while, until Nitori eventually blurts out, "We were - we dated. At the time. It's not like we just..." Rin doesn't stop him, but Nitori still trails off and says, "nevermind. Sorry."

Some of their classmates walk by, immersed in their own conversation. Rin waits until they've gone by, the whole time mentally talking himself out of asking when Nitori started having sex casually - outside of relationships. He knows it's none of his business. Instead he asks, "why'd you break up?"

Nitori doesn't meet his eyes but counters, "why did you and Nanase-san break up?"

Rin snaps his head in Nitori's direction, eyebrows high. "What?"

The younger boy wears a childish pout, cheeks puffed up and lips pursed as he stares straight ahead.

"Ai, I was _never_ dating Haru."

Nitori's shoulders releax a fraction. He looks up at Rin, still sulking like he doesn't believe him.

"It's not even any of your business," Rin hears himself snapping. Nitori's body curls just slightly, a defensive motion that puts space between them. Rin hadn't realized how close they were walking. Hadn't noticed Nitori's knuckles brushing against his until now that they are gone.

They shop in a tense and awkward silence, Nitori pointedly giving him the could shoulder and Rin too prideful to push past it. The walk back to campus is much the same. Nitori does not wait up for him before seeking out his friend.

***

They are fighting, apparently.

Nitori is rarely in his presence, in their dorm or otherwise. He only notices on his third day without a roommate that there's been a post-it note on Nitori's desk that says _sleeping over at Kagamins to help w/ the festival_ , followed by a stupidly drawn cartoon self-portrait of Nitori. (Rin only recognizes it by the mole.)

If he didn't know the kid better, he would think that meant they weren't fighting.

Nitori does not text him or come over to chat with him during the festival preparations. The most they interact is when Nitori shoves a folded uniform into his hands, looking convincingly chipper. "Text me if it needs any adjustments," he says, when he would normally insist Rin wear it now and let him see. Then, like he's rubbing it in Rin's face, his tone feigning innocence, "I'll have Kagamin fix it."

And then he whirls, fast as if he has busy-work to do. The smile had fell from his face before he'd finished turning away.

Rin tries on the uniform, grateful that he is a butler and not a maid this year. It fits perfectly, as expected of Nitori's accurate measuring.

He texts Nitori _fits fine._

 _k_ is the only reply he gets.

Rin scowls at his phone for a very long time. He changes back into his uniform. Checks his phone again. Wanders campus and tries to look busy whenever there's a teacher nearby. Easy enough; his schoolmates are all intuitively understanding and will start chatting him up about events and decorations like they're in on a secret. He doesn't know half their names, but it makes him feel fondly towards Samezuka to have them conspire with him with such good-nature.

But then he checks his phone again and still has no new messages. Pace. Check phone. Pace. This goes on for half the day before Rin decides - fuck it. He sneaks off campus before school is out and makes it to Iwatobi just as their final bell rings.

They are preparing for their festival, too. There is a poster for it hanging by the gates, and he reads over it while he waits for them, knowing their club activities are on hold until after the festival. Their festival will be after his.

He wonders if Nitori would come with him.

He wonders if they will have made up by then.

Rin is not completely oblivious to his own idiocy. Especially not with the way Haruka refuses to spoil him. Haruka is not cruel. He does not say things without purpose or reason. But if it comes up, he does not hold back in reminding Rin how he can be. Rin pushed them away. Rin threw tantrums and spiraled into his own insecurities and rejected all the help he could have gotten.

And he was rewarded for it. (Makoto's eyes will flicker over towards Rei guiltily, and on some level, Rin is offended that Nagisa does not to the same. Not that it matters when Rei is pointedly avoiding everyone's eyes.)

Rin is good at holding grudges and dragging out fights. He is not good at apologies.

Makoto's hand claps him on the shoulder, but it is a gentle and worried touch. "Are you alright?" He asks first, long before considering asking why Rin is there. "Haru is staying late to help with the festival prep... Do you want me to go get him?"

Rin wonders why Makoto always assumes that Haruka is the center of everyone's world. Probably because he is the center of Makoto's. The redhead shakes his head.

"No, it's fine. I'll walk you home?"

Makoto smiles at him, and that's worth how awkward the words felt.

They make small-talk the whole way home. Small-talk has always bored the shit out of Rin, but he likes it when Makoto tells him about Haruka getting kidnapped by the art club and Nagisa going on snack-runs and returning with random snacks, having completely ignored all specific requests except for Rei's.

He is grateful when they reach Makoto's house, because the brunet's question about Nitori gets cut off by Ren and Ran shrieking their excitement and tackling him at the waist.

They spend the afternoon playing videogames with the twins, but Rin is careful to leave before dinner. He knows he will feel too out of place, surrounded by this family that isn't split into pieces, and he needs to get back to the dorm in time for curfew anyway.

Makoto sees him to the door, and for a couple minutes longer they linger outside in the sunset.

"You should come to our festival," Makoto tells him, shifting his weight because he knows Rin needs to leave.

Rin nods. "I will. Your club doing anything?"

A laugh; "No, everything's by class. Nagisa's is doing a cosplay photo booth. Ours is a haunted house. Pretty generic, right?"

They end up staying there with more god-forsaken small talk that Rin doesn't even hate for another thirty minutes. Rin gets home after curfew, but no one seems to notice in all the festival hype.

Except for Nitori, apparently back to their dorm, who looks at him suspiciously but says nothing. Rin glares at him, because who is he to give him that look when he's been gone for days?

***

"Hair," Nitori says to him, the first words they have spoken in a week. The boy is crossing his arms over the flat chest of his maid uniform. Rin blinks at him, and the boy has the decency to shift his weight shyly, the only give that not everything is normal. "You should put your hair up. It would look... Nice. With the uniform."

All the boys around them, most of them in dresses, but a couple others dressed in sleek suits, are shuffling back and forth setting up their final preparations before customers can come in. Campus has already opened its gates to the public.

Rin looks at Nitori, feeling his eyebrows furrow against his will. Not that Rin hasn't done his fair share of shunning friends, but it's different when Nitori is the one doing it to him. Leaving him alone in their dorm room. Having sleepovers with his ex. Looking hot on campus where other people can see him.

How dare he.

Nitori is used to this costume by now, and he is normally comfortable in wearing it. But his eyes flicker to Rin's, then back down to his shoes like he can't hold his gaze. That is something like an apology.

Rin says, "Put it up for me."

And Nitori blinks at him. "Okay." He motions for Rin to sit down, and the redhead seats himself in front of him. Nitori finger-combs his hair, careful that it's a tidy ponytail to match his clean-uniform.

"I have," Rin begins, but Nitori has already pulled away and his hair is up. He falters. "Uh. Hair-ties..."

"I had one," Nitori mumbles to him. Then his fingers are back, rubbing against the exposed nape of Rin's neck. They stay that way for a moment, Nitori massaging out his neck and Rin trying not to melt as he wonders why the kid had hair-ties when his hair is too short to make use of them. The room is too busy and loud for anyone to take much notice of them, but Rin feels like it's empty except the two of them.

But the moment passes. One of the boys shouts that they're opening shop, and there is a collective groan from the first and second years.

Rin stands up, and Nitori pushes his chair back into place.

The sounds of the hallway flood into the classroom, but he still hears Nitori whisper, not meeting his gaze, "You look nice, Rin-senpai."

Rin ruffles his hair and tells him what none of the other boys in dresses want to hear, "You too." Nitori beams, and Rin keeps his eyes on the door, making sure no one has come inside yet as he leans down to whisper in Nitori's ear; "We're doing it tonight."

"Of course, Senpai," Nitori says, and Rin thinks he sounds amused as he wanders off to get to work.

***

The Iwatobi boys visit with Gou and Chigusa at their side. Rin doesn't mind serving them, even as they bicker amongst themselves and linger too long as if there is nothing else at the school that interests them. Gou swoons over the outfit and Chigusa compliments his hair. Rei can't stop talking about the design of the dresses, and Nagisa won't leave Nitori alone.

At first Rin thinks it's hilarious. Nitori is always so kind, but to Nagisa he is dead-pan and openly irritated. This used to bother him - that they didn't get along. But he can see the small tells, now, that this is just their dynamic. Nitori's mouth twitches when he snaps at the blond, like he has to force back a smile. And although he replies flatly to Nagisa's comments, he's always saying things to the others to set him up with opportunity.

Rin is busy serving his own customers, but he doesn't socialize with them. He takes orders and he delivers, and it is easy in its simplicity. He does not make small talk or smile, but he's not oblivious to the swooning girls that come back multiple times in the day and whisper about his eyes when they think he's out of earshot.

He's also not oblivious to the way Nitori stares them down intensely from across the room. It's really kind of endearing the way he clenches his fists, then smooths out his skirt again and again.

Makoto tells Rin, "We'll be exploring for a bit longer, so if you're set free, text me."

"Sure," Rin agrees, seeing them off. He makes eye contact with Haruka, then suddenly is self conscious and looks over to see where Nitori is looking.

Instead he catches Nagisa leaning and and whispering something into the boy's ear. Catches Nitori smile and nod, and the two of them laugh together.

"They get along," Haruka comments, quietly.

Rin nods.

Haruka adds, noncomitally, "Nagisa is evil."

Makoto appears to have overheard, judging by the way he startles, then laughs into his hand.

***

Rin gets the text that they have all left campus before he's relieved of his duties. His eyes dart over the message before he slips his phone back in his pocket.

Once they were gone, it becomes hell.

They had been something to focus on.

Now he has nothing but Nitori. He isn't sure if it was 'Kagamin's' idea or Nitori's, but that skirt definitely got shorter since the kid last wore it. This time he isn't wearing thigh-highs, but sleek dark tights that make his legs shine under the lights. They make his legs look smooth and long and _distracting_ as fuck.

Nitori adjusts his apron ribbon at his waist, arching his back to reach behind himself. His body is stretched and on display, and Rin has to tear his eyes away. He wouldn't mind if Nitori caught him, but they are in a room full of classmates and he _knows_ it's on purpose.

It gets worse when the photography club representative swings by to take some pictures. The butlers aren't terribly opposed, and a couple of the maids volunteer with enthusiasm, making super-hero poses and silly faces at the camera. Nitori is among them. They take some candid shots of the distracted workers, then some nicer profiles and group photos.

Then, elbowing each other and laughing, they decide to take more joke photos.

Rin's gut twists uncomfortably when one of the faceless boys in Nitori's year says loudly, "Aiichirou, do a sexy pose!" (The girls he had been chatting up whistle their approval.)

Nitori turns towards them, his expression wide eyed over his shoulder. He feigns confusion, but then puts a finger to his pouty lips, batting his eyes. Half the room is cracking up over the sound of the camera's clicks.

Nitori unties the ribbon at his chest slowly, his other hand still teasing at his lips with his fingertips suggestively. More clicks, more laughter, and to everyone in the room this is an innocent joke.

Rin is hard as hell, stealing glances at the clock every five seconds. Almost free. Almost.

The final straw is when Nitori sits on a cleared supply table, swinging one leg dramatically over the other, slow enough to get frame-by-frame photos of the motion. He holds his weight up carefully like he's _actually_ modeling.

At the whoops and hollers, Nitori meets Rin's eyes and starts to hike his skirt up, teasingly slow.

"Ai," Rin says, his voice louder than he meant it to be. He tries not to sound gruff.

Nitori hops down from the desk, and the moment is over. The room is loud with chattering and laughter again, but the photographers are back to talking with whatever friends they spot in the room. (Rin wonders how to inconspicuously get those photos for himself and destroy all other copies.)

"Did you need something, Senpai?" Nitori asks, but his smug expression doesn't match the friendly tone.

"You're off." It is not a question. Nitori has been working the same hours as Rin, and Rin would fight anyone who tried to claim Nitori doesn't deserve a break.

***

Rin drags Nitori by the wrist, at first, storming down the crowded halls. It's easy to weave in and out of people, and Nitori follows along with only an ocassional tug for freedom, weak and only for appearances.

Nitori does not complain until they are all the way back to the dorm. He leans back against the closed door, hands behind his back, and sulks, "I don't want to miss the festival, Rin-senpai."

"Then go back afterwards," Rin snaps. He closes the distance between them, setting his arms on either side of Nitori like a trap. He watches him carefully, seeking any signs that he shouldn't. If Nitori wants to escape, he'll let him. He speaks without meaning to, hearing the bitter words like a stranger's, "I need you to be mine for a bit."

Nitori looks genuinely baffled by the words. They are, Rin will admit, a little intense for a freinds-with-benefits arrangement. "What?"

He doesn't want to care this much when Nitori is gone or ignores him. Haruka never charges his goddamn phone, and his friends all live across town. It shouldn't irritate him if Nitori strays from his side for a couple of days at the most.

He doesn't want to explain that, and he knows they were just getting along fairly well, but e still growls, "Are you still mad at me?"

Nitori huffs, falling back into their conflict like a switch. He mutters angrily, "You were rude."

Rin considers apologizing for a very brief moment, but luckily Nitori saves them from the long silence during which it inevitably would not have happened. The younger boy shakes his head. "And _you_ were mad at me."

"Yeah, but..."

Nitori waits.

Rin falters, his weight going heavy on his arms. He tries to compose a sentence in his head before talking but the time ticks by awkwardly and he wants to fight away the silence. "Ai, we should be," his eyes dart down to the maid dress pointedly, "more."

For a moment Nitori looks confused, repeating quietly, "More?"

More than friends with benefits. More than this. Together.

Nitori's expression goes surprised, but not in the pretty way Rin wants. The younger boy looks _horrified_ , and Rin immediately pulls his arms back. He doesn't miss the way Nitori's hand slides towards the door knob like he wants to run away.

But he doesn't. Instead he forces himself to look curious, the expression painfully fake by Nitori's standards. He feebly tries to play dumb and murmurs, "Um, you're right, let's - do more. Not stand here."

Rin understands he means _not talk_. Not a very good answer.

"Don't stress," he tries to command him. Nitori had told him the same and it had kind of helped.

It at least gets the younger boy to laugh, and his shoulders finally loosen. His fingers are still brushing over the door knob for comfort, but his other hand undoes the first button of his dress. "I'm not stressing, Senpai. I just..." A sigh, then a quieter admission, "I'm stressing."

Rin leans in close, mouthing against the boy's neck and feeling his smaller body shiver. "Why?" Rin asks, letting Nitori's hands unbuttoning his vest. He returns the favor, untying the ribbon at Nitori's hip. He kisses up Nitori's jaw until he is at his eager lips.

They undress each other between kisses, Nitori unable to answer and Rin only mildly invested in giving him the chance. Rin's jacket and vest drop to the floor and his shirt gets unbuttoned. Nitori's apron falls to the floor, but when Rin starts to tug down the zipper at the back of the dress, Nitori freezes, his mouth going still against Rin's.

"Uh," the smaller boy manages into Rins teeth.

"You should take it off."

Nitori tries to back up, but his back is already flush against the door. Rin pays close attention to his hand leaving the door knob coming back to rest against the taller boy's chest. As if they haven't slept together a dozen times, he is red-faced and can't keep his eyes on Rin's.

Rin pauses. He pulls away from Nitori completely, privately pleased at the way the smaller boy whines after him. But he asks, "What's wrong?"

Nitori hooks a finger in Rin's belt-loop, staring down at his hand intently. "Nothing."

"But you're stressing."

Nitori huffs at him. "You're making me stress."

Rin wants to be understanding, but he just feels irritation burning up in him. Now he understands the stereo-types about friends with benefits. This is a hassle. He snaps, "Ai," demanding real answers.

Nitori snaps right back, wrenching his hand back to himself and smoothing out his skirt like a nervous tic. "I _know_ ," Nitori tells him, practically rolling his eyes, "that you like me. And I've been trying really hard to just ignore that you're obvious and pretend not to notice."

Rin is too startled to be angry. He feels his cheeks warming all over again. "Uh."

He continues vehemently, "And I'm _stressing_ because if we actually - if... If we..." He struggles for words for a moment. Smooths his skirt again. "What if we break up?"

For a long moment, Rin just stares at him, incredulous. " _That's_ what you're worried about?" He's always known Nitori thinks ahead and likes to have back-up plans for the worst case scenarios, but this is ridiculous. He tries to think of an argument Nitori will like more than just pointing out how stupid he is to leap to such pessismistic outcomes.

Nitori just turns his head to the side like an avoidance, but looks at Rin, sidelong.

"Ai, we have to date before you can start thinking of breaking up with me."

Fast as reflex, "I wouldn't!"

Rin throws his hands up in exhasperation, looking at the smaller boy like he is an idiot. He deserves it, right now. It's not as if _Rin_ was going to break up with him. For fuck's sake, Rin was the one who wanted to ask him out to begin with. Nitori had been the one who was all casual all the time, desperately throwing his all into avoiding that.

"Look," Rin tries to reason with him, "think of - your friend. That one guy." Rin does not even know his name besides the nickname, but Nitori still seems to understand.

"Kagamin?"

"Sure, whatever. Dude's your ex, right? So you're still on good terms."

"It's different." Nitori shakes his head. "You - we're roommates. That would be uncomfortable." He starts out calm enough, but sounds desperate when he adds, "This is already uncomfortable, can we just - have sex or something?"

Rin dismisses him with a flat "nah, don't want to." But they are much too close and the bulge of his erection is still against Nitori.

The smaller boy rolls his eyes, then shoves his chest, but it is light and playful, despite the tense mood. He looks to relax a bit, afterwards. He looks up at Rin, blue eyes clear. "I want to. But I don't. I'm not sure - and so... I'm sorry about mixed signals."

Rin rolls his eyes as well, but it is not aggressive.

"Your fall out with Nanase-san," Nitori eventually says, quiet. "I know I'm not as important to you yet, but I wouldn't want you to... Um... You know. Have to go through something similar."

"Ai. How many times do I have to tell you, I was _never_ dating Haru?"

Nitori looks at him, blue eyes clear and vivid. "Did you ever want to?"

"No," Rin says, and is surprised to realize that it is true. He has lusted for Haruka before. Has loved Haruka. Has pined for him and _wanted_ him. But he has never wanted to be a couple with him like he does with Nitori.

Nitori doesn't look entirely convinced, and Rin just shrugs at him, suddenly feeling awkward.

To fight it, Rin closes the gap between them again, feeling weightless. Nothing is resolved. The conversation got weird and fell off like an unexpected cliffside. But it's nice to have everything aired out. It may be an inconvenient situation, but at least now he can see all of it. Nitori doesn't tense up when Rin is in his space, doesn't push him away or assure himself of an escape.

Nitori relaxes too, hands resting on Rin's shirt and allowing him to draw in to a kiss. They make their way to the bed smoothly without parting, like a dance. Nitori is gently guiding him with his hand fisted in his shirt.

Rin unzips the back of his dress as they go; it falls to the floor at the side of the bed, the sound light and satisfying.

It's - strange. Undressing him. But it comes easily. Nitori's hands rest over his when Rin slides the tights down his legs. The sounds of the festival don't reach all the way to the dorms, and it is empty and quiet. Even the two of them fall into silence, neither comfortable or tense.

Nitori lays on his stomach on Rin's bunk, his bare body on display. Rin grabs a bottle of lube kept between his bed and th wall and climbs over the smaller boy. He's still mostly clothed, himself, a role reversal from the usual way they do this. He spreads some of the lube onto his hands.

Nitori lets out a quiet "mnn," when Rin's hands touch his back, shivering at the cold. It warms up soon enough with Rin rubbing him down. He digs his thumbs in hard, massaging at his shoulders. The boy beneath him lets out a breathy, "ahh, Rin-senpai..."

Rin hums back an affirmation. He feels his cock straining against his pants at the sight. Nitori's skin is smooth and pretty, reddening under his touch. All the bite marks he's left have healed and faded, and he rubs out patterns along where they were. He runs his hands down Nitori's spine, fanning out his fingers.

He doesn't hesitate when he reaches his ass. He knows lingering too long will make things awkward, and he doesn't want to it to be. He spreads Nitori's cheeks and dribbles more lube onto him, ignoring the boy's gasp.

They've already slept together. Touching his body is nothing new. Oddly, the rub-down felt more intimate. So it's a comfort to get back to the familiar. He rubs his thumb against Nitori's entrance, pleased with the quiet whimper and the way he pushes back against it.

His pace is slow on purpose, despite Nitori's mewls. He likes listening to the boy's labored breathing. Watching him bury his face in Rin's pillow, panting with want. Nitori squrims, rubbing his thighs together helplessly. His body is begging.

Rin switches to using two fingers instead.

Nitori chokes, then writhes against him. He must like it more, this way. Rin can reach much deeper now, but his pace stays slow and languid. The younger boy's hips rise up, and Rin belatedly realizes that Nitori is rubbing himself against his sheets in his desperation. Fuck, fuck, that's hot. Rin angles his fingers and wonders if he could make him come just from this.

Pale skin is flushed as Nitori arches into him. He moans, resting his head on his arms and his ass in the air. " _Mm_ , Senpai," Nitori murmurs, and sighs contedley. He sounds completely lost in the moment, and Rin wonders if he even realizes it was out loud when he breathes, "love you."

Rin feels his heart skip a beat but refuses to linger on the moment and fall into awkwardness. He continues on fingering him as if he hadn't heard a thing. Nitori's press back against his hand is getting more demanding, though, even if the boy looks blissed out enough to fall asleep. His breathing is so heavy, and just the sound of it keeps Rin hot and hard.

He tries not to be over-eager, but kicking his pants off only takes seconds, and soon he is rubbing his cock up against Nitori's entrance, feeling him push back wantonly.

He slides up to kiss the back of his flushed neck. "You want me?"

Nitori nods mutely.

They do not make it back to the festival that day.

***

They go to the Iwatobi culture festival together, not hand in hand, because it would be embarrassing to be caught, but close enough that Nagisa's eyes hone in like they're laser-guided.

"Hands!" He exclaims, pointing furiously at the minimal space between Rin and Nitori, where their fingers brush together, the same way their shoulders do. Nagisa whirls to make sure Rei is aware of the situation. Rei aggressively ignores him.

"Yo," Rin greets, deciding to that Rei's method of coping seems to be working.

No one else calls them out, which is nice, because there isn't really anything _to_ call out. Yet.

None of the swim club boys are working at the festival, that day. Makoto explains that theirs lasts two days, and all of them are scheduled to actually look over their class' activities tomorrow.

Rin is glad that they all get to spend a festival together, since he was working all through his. There's a certain nostalgia to these kinds of events, even if they mostly just wander hallways decorated with uninspired construction-paper streamers. It's still nice.

It's difficult to maneuver through the halls in such a large group. Before he really knows how it's happening, Nagisa is the one at his side, Rei and Makoto leading the way to the gym to relax and watch the performances scheduled shortly. Behind him, Nitori upholds a cheerful one-sided conversation with Haruka with ease.

There is so much sound all around them. Students of other schools and parents all making pleasant comments about the school, Iwatobi students in costumes dashing back and forth with back-up supplies. All the different activities and events and their advertisors beckoning the boys.

Rin feels a bit like he's surrounded by words the same way water wraps him up. It's nice. It's comforting and pleasant and familiar, while simultaneously being overwhelming all around him.

Nagisa is chattering his ear off about the different costumes they have at their event tomorrow, telling him to come take a photo shoot. Makoto is discussing with Rei the aesthetic of the thater club sets that Haruka had been kidnapped into helping out with, the two of them looking amused as they glance back fondly.

Rin does his best to look like he's still listening to Nagisa, but really he takes acute interest in the way Haruka breathes out curiously at whatever Nitori is saying.

There is a pause, after Nitori has spoken. Then Haruka finally says, "I tried to confess," sounding impressively invested in their conversation.

Rin's steps falter, and he hopes no one noticed. But Nagisa is quieter, suddenly, easier to hear them over. He looks at Rin, sidelong and innocent as ever, still rambling about God-knows-what.

Nitori lets out an impressed hum.

Haruka adds, like an after-thought: "He didn't notice."

The two of them snicker to each other, as if conspiring. Rin can count the number of times he's seen Haruka laugh on one hand, _including_ this time. But the two of them lean in towards each other like they're creating their own world, and Nitori says a bit lightly, the laughter still on his lips, "I'm sorry to hear that."

Haruka shakes his head, still smiling gently, though his eyes are no longer meeting Nitori's. "Wouldn't have gone well, anyway. I know that." Blue eyes catch red, and Haruka almost looks smug, as if he's caught Rin red-handed for looking over his shoulder. Stupid Haruka, Rin thinks. Stupid Haruka who had been the _only one_ to not pick up on his thing for Nitori but is still the one to give him suh pointed looks.

Then Haruka leans in towards Nitori, their bodies growing ever closer. Haruka leans down to close just a couple more inches of space between them, and his voice goes quieter still. Their shoulders are touching. Messed strands of Nitori's hair mix with Haruka's, their faces are getting so close. Haruka is saying something about "Maybe it was too subtle. Went with a swimming metaphor."

Nitori laughs, "I would have expected that to work." Then, after a moment he murmurs, "Thank you."

Haruka nods.

***

They watch awful student-written stand up routine and listen to decent last-minute bands with not enough practice. They get their fortunes told and eat cheap food and Nagisa is a noisy idiot that has them all laughing their asses off harder than the comedy duos. Even Nitori gives up on pretending not to be amused by his back-and-forth with Rei out of whatever shota-competitiveness Rin assumes he harbors.

It's nice to be surrounded by all of them. To have Nitori with him _and_ his old friends, all of them chattering on with or without him forcing them to.

And at the end of the day, they wind up at Haruka's house.

"Tomorrow will be a hassle," Nagisa is complaining, and this time he is the one who sprawls out and takes up as much of the floor as he can. He replants his feet against the floor idly. "We'll have to actually _work_."

The others all chime in their "Yeahs," except for Haruka, who's blithe voice cuts through all the others as he says, "Well, I don't."

Makoto blinks. "What?"

Haruka shrugs. "Art club," he explains. It's not enough for anyone else, but Makoto seems to understand and nods, looking thoughtful.

"It's cool that your festival is longer, though," Nitori comments, crouched outside to play with the stray cat in the yard. "I wouldn't exect it from such a small school."

Rin snickers to himself, because even when Nitori is being friendly, there's still a certain haughty undertone. And he wants his friends to get along, really he does, but it's also _really_ funny. It's easy not to stress when everyone else dismisses it.

Rei nudges Nagisa out of the way to get comfortable, himself, and says, "In the next city over there's a festival that lasts five days."

With the door open, the conversation flow easily through the living room and the backyard, all of the Iwatobi boys lounging around nearby.

Rin is the one who catches the time first and has to shove his hands in his pockets in disappointment. He doesn't even call out to Nitori before the boy is meeting his gaze over his shoulder and straightening with an air of closure.

They are seen off after lingering far too long, as always, and make their way back towards campus in the quiet.

Rin watches his breath in the air, rising up towards the stars, and feels Nitori's fingers slip between his.

He squeezes back, but they do not talk.

***

In their dorm room, Nitori peels off his shirt, starting to rummage through his dresser with it still hanging off of one arm. He digs out a pair of pajama pants.

Rin tries to watch him change inconspicuously, but he's exhausted from a busy day, so really he just stands in the doorway and blatantly stares.

When Nitori has the pajama pants on and moves on to finding a loose T-shirt, Rin tells him, "That's fine."

Nitori blinks at him, more amused than surprised.

Rin opens his mouth to tell Nitori - to sleep in his bed, tonight. Not just for sex, but for warmth and to be comfortable and to cuddle. And maybe make out a little bit. And maybe have sex too, fine, but that's not the point.

The younger boy laughs, though, and cuts him off. "So you really didn't notice? Nanase-san's confession."

Rin runs a hand through his hair, then catches his own nervous tic and tugs his shirt off too as a distraction. His voice is gruff with awkwardness more than irritation. "I guess not."

When he's finished changing, he turns around to Nitori already settled comfortable on the bottom bunk of the bed.

"Then I'll be blunt," Nitori says, then holds out his arms, beckoning Rin to join him. "Ravish me, Senpai."

Rin snorts and has to cover his mouth to hold back the startled laughter.

"And also date me," Nitori throws in like an after thought.

He does as he's told on both counts.

**Author's Note:**

> don't look at me i'm trash


End file.
